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March 28, 2006
GFC Player Handbook 2006 Part III
Matt McCarthy - #26
Kolonel:
Dubbed 'Cazaly' by the Chant Guy, McCarthy’s no show during pre-season is an ominous sign his days at Skilled Stadium are running out. His woes with set shots now mean he makes way for proficient finishers like Nathan Ablett and, *snickers* Kent Kingsley. Hey, at least he played more games than his Dad.
Shaitan:
I can't see Matthew lasting another season on the senior list. He has had plenty of chances to make it at senior level. And for whatever reason, be it injury or lack of form, he has not managed to establish himself in the side.
Sammy D:
Quite simply, he is finished. Not necessarily his fault, his body just can't hack the rigours of an AFL football club.
Darren Milburn - #39
Kolonel:
The best player to never have had a position. Milburn likes it tough and gives it out tougher, making him one of the Kolonel’s favorites. I have however always had a sneaking suspicion he may have had some plastic surgery. Don’t ask me why though. Expect as always a grand year from him.
Shaitan:
One of the best players at the club. Incredibly skillful and determined to succeed. Not much more to be said.
Sammy D:
No matter where he is playing, he'll do a job for you. Not a whole lots needs to be said about Dasher, skillfull, consistent and no doubt in the first five picked every game.
Cameron Mooney - #21
Kolonel:
All the things the Kolonel is, except he can play footy. Wild, aggressive and prone to dropping the odd cursive word Mooney has fast become a cult player down at the Cattery. A self proclaimed Dickhead, will be worshipped forever if he can reproduce some the form during the 2005 finals series where he was our best performed player.
Shaitan:
For those of you who don't know the Kolonel, he is nothing like Cameron Mooney. Moondog has been unlucky the last couple of seasons with injuries and has had to play hurt on many occasions. He looks as fit as a fiddle this season and has been playing some inspired football in the pre-season. I wouldn't touch his fashion label however ;)
Sammy D:
The big hairy mongoose. Gotta love him. He has his moments that make you wanna jump the fence and slap him around a bit to get some sense into him, but then you remember you'd be short $5000. Apart from these moments he's one of the most improved footballers I have ever seen. He has really stood up for his club, no matter which variety of roles he is playing.
Brad Ottens - #6
Kolonel:
Shaitan is going to go to town on the Doughnut King, so I'll keep it short. He did shag Kings missus, I would know because I was there... I mean, err, ummm... What a great tackle that was in round 1!
Shaitan:
I will be writing an opinion piece closer to the start of the season on Otto. Right now, all I have to say is, I hope he can be fit for round 1.
Sammy D:
The big question: Does our premiership hopes rest on the shoulders of Brad Ottens? To a big extent you have to say yes. Like "Bomber" reckons, with a fit Ottens & King on the field we're going to win a lot more games than without them. Let's hope we can get good games out of the big guys at the right end of the season.
Stephen Owen - #31
Kolonel:
Has the hard task of wearing the great Number 31, worn by such maligned stars as the great David Mensch. Looks like Dopey the Dwarf with his kooky little grin, but is being compared by some *looks at Shaitan* to Steve Johnson after being plucked somewhat from obscurity in the 2005 National Draft. Let’s hope the comparisons aren’t coming because of their performances off the field...
Shaitan:
This kid looks the goods to me. I have taken him under my wing and labelled him one of my 'elites'. He has that same Dopey, but shifty look about him, not too dissimilar to Dog Johnson. I can't see him making his AFL debut this season, but I'll be getting along to the VFL to watch him for sure.
Sammy D:
Know nothing about him except he has ostitus pubis which the club didn't know about until after they drafted him.
Henry Playfair - #22
Kolonel:
I still don’t know what to make of Henry the Octopus, I guess its best to say he’ll hang around until we find someone who is better. Kicks like he is actually using tentacles, but is a strong mark. Similar to McCarthy but with more chances, less injuries and an equally bad hairdo.
Shaitan:
H improved last year. It was unfortunate that he broke his jaw and lost a lot of confidence in his ability however. I finally discovered why the club has been keeping him in cotton wool over the summer. Apparently he has overdone it on the weights and they thought he might be suffering from OP. It was cleared today that he is not. I hope he can get back into some form, as when he was going well, we were winning games in 2005.
Sammy D:
Has his fair share of flaws & critics, but he is young & the best we have. Has improved a lot in a short time, so hopefully this trend will continue and we see the confidence of early 2005 return to him. Gotta kick 4 goals in a game to win me a slab Big H!
Brent Prismall - #32
Kolonel:
The Baby faced boy from Werribee has beefed up over the break, putting him in the Kolonels top 5 sexiest Cats. I have never met him, but I reckon he’d have a lisp. Can someone who has met him pleasthe comfirm thisth for me in the commentsth sthection below?
Shaitan:
I haven't seen a lot of the kid, but what I've seen, I have liked. He is hard at it, has a decent kick on him and wins plenty of the footy. I suggested after seeing the intraclub games that he will never be as prolific as a Joel Corey, racking up 25 possessions a game, but he will certainly get 15-20. Will debut in the NAB Cup and should get a handful of games in the season proper.
Sammy D:
I can't comment a lot on Prismall, because all I have are scratchy memories from the NAB Cup to go on, but he looks like he can certainly play after looking very nervous early. Should get a couple of chances this season without doubt.
Peter Riccardi - #15
Kolonel:
The assy and classy Riccardi had nothing better to do this year, so he’d thought he'd have a crack at 300 games and a flag. He may well regret it half way through the season when he realises both are but a pipedream and he has wasted many chances to be out on the golf course instead of nursing sore hamstrings.
Shaitan:
I love Ricco. He's got better with age in my opinion. He is the type of player who, when the game is in the balance, he can come on and kick a couple of goals or setup a couple of nice plays to get the boys going. I'm going to miss him next year but I hope he gets a Premiership, so at least one of the greats from the 94-95 side can have a medal.
Sammy D:
If you're a Geelong supporter and you don't know anything about Ricco you're not much chop. Let's hope the hamstrings hold up for the year and he can get to that 300 game mark. Speedster (just for Sticko)
Jarad Rooke - #33
Kolonel:
Fast becoming a reliable hitman much in the mode of Al Capone, but with less spaghetti stains on his shirt. Rooke is a no frills, no vision rough nut who would go head on against a Sherman Tank to win the footy. Great to watch.
Shaitan:
The kid is massive now compared to when he joined the club. He laid an impressive amount of tackles in one game last year (11 if my memory serves me correctly) and just attacks the footy like no other player at the club. He needs to work on his vision at times, but he is definitely in our best 22 and I look forward to another respectable season.
Sammy D:
Can't get enough of Jarad. Improved out of sight, my favourite player. Love his attitude, determination & toughness.
Matthew Scarlett - #30
Kolonel:
The Mop-Top defender is pivotal to the Cats Premiership hopes this season. The Kolonel has spotted him in a few pink shirts of late which can’t be good, so he will have to win back my trust by gaining selection in the AA team this year and smacking more Irish blokes.
Shaitan:
I love him.
Sammy D:
In my eyes the best full back in the competition.
Tim Sheringham - #47
Kolonel:
If Owen looks like Dopey the Dwarf, then Sheringham looks like a little pixie. Really needs to rethink his hairdo. Saw a lot of him in the VFL last season, which is why I am not getting as excited about him as many others who are basing their opinions on what Jay Clark writes, which is a big No No.
Shaitan:
This kid has surprised me. He looks a bit like Shannon Byrnes, but seems to have better skills with a little less pace. He's been handy for the VFL side on the back flank and rotating through the midfield. He is still rookie listed however and is unlikely to get games this year unless a long-term injury occurs.
Sammy D:
Haven't seen much of "Shezza" so my opinion is limited. Can't really see him getting off the injury list unless we are hit with the biggest injury crisis the club has ever seen.
Will Slade - #37
Kolonel:
I am perplexed as to why the club kept Slade, it may be because he drives an Audi. It certainly has nothing to do with his footballing ability that’s for sure. He is woeful. Its all downhill skiing for him from here *snickers*
Shaitan:
Gone next year.
Sammy D:
Will wasn't half bad in the NAB Cup, maybe there is hope for him yet. Won't Healy be pleased!
Matthew Spencer - #25
Kolonel:
The Chant Guys lovechild dresses like a homeboy, but I’m not going to diss him because he’ll wreck me before I check myself. Turns slower than the QE2 which means he will ultimately struggle at AFL level unless he plays on Wade Skipper.
Shaitan:
Spencer has struggled to adjust the rigours of AFL footy. The tempo of the game seems to be above him. He has a gigantic turning circle and doesn't always beat his opponent. I wouldn't expect him to debut this year (with the exception of the NAB Cup) and he will struggle to stay on the list at the end of the year.
Sammy D:
Spencer tries hard, but I just don't think he has it at the AFL level. Seems a handy defender, just this mobility really really really hurts him. Still, if he gets the nod he might be alright against a 3rd-4th forward.
Matthew Stokes - #27
Kolonel:
A zookeeper/small forward selected to be best friends with Travis Varcoe. I shall say nothing more.
Shaitan:
From what I've seen, he isn't particularly tall and doesn't quite understand the team's game plan or his place in it. My first thought was, "he's never played as a forward crumber" because he didn't have much idea about the drop zone and front in square positioning. I'm sure it will take him time to adjust, but at the moment he doesn't look ready.
Sammy D:
Did a few good things in the NAB Cup, but he's probably at the bottom of the midfielders list as we speak (apart from maybe the injured Varcoe or Gamble). Has quite a bit of pace and seems to be able to use the ball alright. Might be more than a "friend" after all.
Kane Tenace - #10
Kolonel:
I don’t know what to make of Kane Tenace. After arriving with big wraps and a few blistering runs in his first year he has gone off the boil. Let’s hope he is not another Scott Bamford, at least his haircuts are much better. Bamford looked like Raylene Boyle.
Shaitan:
This kid will be good. To be fair, if he didn't fumble last year, he would have been a permanent fixture. I think he'll get over his fumbles and become a very handy player. A goal kicking midfielder with pace. Something we desperately need.
Sammy D:
Big year for Turbo. Looked really good in the NAB Cup except for the occassional kick. I said this last seaosn, he looks primed to make his mark and then he proceeded to flop. Don't let us down again please!
Travis Varcoe - #5
Kolonel:
The man given the number 5 has yet to make an appearance on the training track which worries the Kolonel. Still, it will be good to have some black magic carving up Skilled Stadium other than Aaron Davey for a change. I wonder if Varcoe has any kids yet?
Shaitan:
Good luck to the boy. I hope the club do the right thing by him and WAIT until he is over his injury before they throw him in the deep end.
Sammy D:
*Proudly sponsored by Sammy D* Can't wait to see him ready to go...
Trent West - #12
Kolonel:
A big boy already, West showcased to the Kolonel why he went number 35 in a weak draft, he cannot kick. That being said not many ruckman can so let’s hope he can ruck. We don’t need another Paul Chambers.
Shaitan:
At this stage, I have to agree with the Kolonel. He struggles to kick the ball properly. He is a cumbersome big man, who doesn't seem to know how to drop the ball on his boot properly. Technique definitely needs work, but he looks quite promising and he is extremely agile for a bloke his size. Impressive fitness levels, too.
Sammy D:
Terrible kick, can mark...on occassions. Get back to you in 3 years Trent.
David Wocjinski - #40
Kolonel:
Monica is back after a year off with a bung knee and was looking mighty beefcake-ish in a few pictures from the Addy. Basically a new recruit, here's hoping he can show Teance the meaning of blistering run, and add some much needed pace back into the side.
Shaitan:
For some reason, many fans hold Wojcinski in very high esteem. I'm not discrediting him as a player at all, I think he is handy, but not as a permanent defender. When Josh Hunt and Monica sit in defence, I worry. Monica is an attacking player naturally and he often plays on instinct by taking on blokes and going the long ball forward, instead of engineering the play like say, Dasher does. I hope he can regain his speed after his injury and win his way back into the team, but I think he is expendable.
Sammy D:
Gotta nurse him through the first 3-4 months of the year. He seems to have bulked up considerably so hopefully that combined with the knee haven't caused him to lose too much pace which is his asset. As the game keeps quickening, Wojer's stakes increase.
...so that's it. We came, we typed, we spouted crap. I hope it was good for you too.
Posted by Sammy D at March 28, 2006 09:01 PM
Comments
The analogy I think you were after with Stokes and Varcoe was that of Henry the pony coming out to Australia with Jardines Lookout for the Melbourne Cup a couple of years back!!
Posted by: year of the cat at March 30, 2006 12:36 PM
None of us are big racing fans so we will take your word for it, but it's a top analogy! Great work
Posted by: Sammy D at March 30, 2006 02:30 PM